As promised last week, as our form of aid for the war in the Ukraine, we created a new play called “Let’s Get Real About Fear” and we are publishing it here today for anyone to use with their teams and it is of course live in the PeopleNotTech Dashboard under the Openness tab in the Playbook.
As we were saying last week, while the world already had much other strife and conflict, this war and the prospect of its escalation, are extra hard to deal with in the wake of the pandemic and when it comes to technical and other distributed teams.
We have clients who have Ukranian colleagues off the grid and unaccounted for; we have clients who have Ukranian team mates still working as if nothing has changed despite the shelling around them; we have clients whose teams are not seemingly affected and we have team are riddled with “survivor guilt” and while everyone is different and experiences different things the one thing we can truly do to help is ensure each of us has had the compassionate space to open up.
We can tell you we have tried the play ourselves, in our own teams and a couple of clients and it is hard. It will be a tough conversation and most people will be very reluctant to engage with it. It is confronting, it is difficult, it is depressing even. We know that. But that is exactly what we can not -or really “should not”- avoid.
Here is the play:
If nothing else works to get the team engaged, as a leader, try and appeal to their empathy and compassion by explaining this may just help one team member out of the total so is it not still worthwhile that we all get through it, if so?
The first thing you will notice once the reluctance is overcome and people engage, is how different the perceptions and reactions of our team members are as compared to our own. And then, eventually the opposite will happen and once the dialogue opens up it becomes truly wide open, raw and honest and that is when the sense of shared reality comes through.
All you will need is a place to write down these affirmations for the team to consider and complete. A board such as this Miro one https://miro.com/app/board/uXjVOdMUHQA=/?invite_link_id=966884337014 or even a shared whiteboard or leaving the play open on the screen will work but you will also need enough good will and courage. Like we said, it may be hard for some teams but you will undoubtedly be pleased you have done it once it happened.
You’ll notice that while team members may have written different responses, when they read them out loud and engage in the dialogue they will agree with others and practically cluster around the newly created commonality.
Not everyone will be able to be fully participate either. Some people maybe triggered or have too little Psychological Safety and too high of a need to impression manage to really be able to apply themselves to this. Make sure you make it very clear at the start of the session that all you ask for is a really good try. Perhaps 10 minutes to read the “Why” together as a team and a few minutes of consideration to the topics but if they should see them on a virtual posit in front of them and simply refuse to answer any, allow any team member to feel free to do so.
Equally, if they reflected but won’t share that’s fine as well. Just see if that means something more and maybe follow up with 1-on-1s to uncover if this if there is anything that can be done to remove this individual issue and ensure this lack of participation in this particular exercise which is particularly emotionally grating, doesn’t also mean it is a symptom of a team dysfunction/ unhealthy team dynamic and obviously, lack of Psychological Safety.
For those of you who will unconditionally participate – thank you. It isn’t easy and we don’t take it lightly. These times come with a whirlwind of emotions for all of us and unearthing them with our team is a powerful yet very uncomfortable and unfamiliar exercise for now.
In tomorrow’s video we’ll accompany this with some of our learnings of how to sensitively introduce this play to your teams so be sure to come back tomorrow to find tips of how to use this in a way that will create and hold the much-needed space of openness, shared reality and compassion.
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The 3 “commandments of Psychological Safety” to build high performing teams are: Understand, Measure and Improve
At PeopleNotTech we make software that measures and improves Psychological Safety in teams. If you care about it- talk to us about a demo at contact@peoplenottech.com
To order the “People Before Tech: The Importance of Psychological Safety and Teamwork in the Digital Age” book go to this Amazon link